I used to love nostalgia and the feeling it gave me. Happy, bittersweet, with a
longing for old times. But right now they don’t seem to matter. Monday my world
shattered. The emptiness and aching for what is now gone is overwhelming.
I can’t not look to the future for excitement or to the past for solace. I am stuck in the here and now with nothing.
Sunday was one of those deliciously chilly mornings. The kind where you burrow into your blankets more for comfort than warmth. Early enough there is no noise about and you are able to have fanciful thoughts lull you back to sleep. Only to be woken up to the sound of rain tapping your window.
A more perfect morning could not have materialized. I pulled on my robe and started the coffee. As the coffee brewed I loaded my player with music. Mostly with classical and heavy on the cello sonatas, as they seem to go hand in hand with this fall weather. I did load the long versions of Beethoven’s Fur Elise and Midnight Sonata since they are magical.
With the smell of coffee wafting from the kitchen I looked high and low for my slippers with the outdoor soles. Of course they were in their box in the closet. I
poured a cup and picked up some wafers.
On my way out I grabbed a small stack of books.
I sat there for the longest time taking it all in. The beauty of fall, the flora and fauna, the rain, the fog. Rain and fog change the landscape in the most inviting way. The fog layered about 3 feet off the ground made it even more enchanting, as if I had entered a delightful new realm. Even trees look different in the rain.
The music captured the moments flawlessly. Especially Bach -Cello Suite No 1, Beethoven’s, Cello Sonata in A Op.69: Allegro, ma non tanto, and Moonlight Sonata. It would take me longer to list my list than listen to it.
I thumbed through the books I brought out. All very interesting picks: 1Q84 – Haruki Murakami, Fool Me Once – Harlan Coben, Charlotte Street – Danny Wallace, The Navigator of New York – Wayne Johnston, and Thunderstruck & Other Stories – Elizabeth McCracken. I chose Fool Me Once by Harlen Coben. There are few books by him I haven’t read yet.
I spent the next several hours reading and getting lost in the beauty that surrounded me. This was the kind of morning that you never want to end or at least last longer than a couple hours. A perfect day indeed.
What a week.
Monday when I was walking home I glanced across the street to see a pig walking in the opposite direction. Talk about a double take. I don’t live in a farm community, so it was bizarre, but it did make me smile. Apparently he belongs to a neighbor and is safe at home once again. It made me think how wonderful it would be to see things like this more often. I wonder if it was a sign. lol
We have a new President and a whole lot of nonsense (from both sides) going on. The acting out online and on the streets is just vulgar. The day after the election I felt quite low, not necessarily because of the turn out, but because I thought that the year + online insanity would finally be over. Well I was wrong. I have second hand embarrassment for the people pulling crap on others because they are unhappy. Not to mention the cringe worthy online bullies. If you don’t like something there are ways of putting it out there that doesn’t end in name calling or threats. That’s enough election talk. I am at this point worn out and bored with all of it.
Most of this week was kept busy with writing and art. I truly enjoy both. My mind has been purging lyrics and melody and my hands have been busy with learning manga drawing. Sketching and reading have really kept my mind in a good place. A place I like.
I haven’t quite got the hang of the once a week blogging yet. I remember the old days of MySpace when at any moment you could just plop down your thoughts and have fun conversations about it. I don’t think that is the case here though. It feels so odd, but art, photos, adventures, and music are soon to come.
Blue Ash – All I Want
Dwight Twilley I’m on Fire
The Babys – Wrong or Right
Big Star – Back of a Car
Artful Dodger – Waiting Place
Crabby Appleton – Go Back
Brian Eno – King’s Lead Hat
Bay City Rollers – Bye Bye Baby
It’s a very chilly morning here in southern California. I love it! I love this time of year. The beauty of fall and winter is like no other. I’ve decided to do a weekly blog, to document what is on my mind with the added bonus of that days soundtrack. Who knows how long this will last, but here we go.
I’ve recently come back from a 5+ month long break on Facebook. I am still questioning this decision and I am not 100% back in the saddle. This year in social media has been one for the books. The built up to this election has proved even more asinine and ridiculous than the last two put together. I love a good discussion with differences of opinions, but this is not what the internet supplies. It brings forth unresearched memes & ignorant rants. So many people seem to be lying in wait to pounce and fight over the silliest of things. Scarier still is the amount of people who do not seem to understand the basic concept of researching bills, props, and candidates. They seem to lack the knowledge of anything that has come before this election and how important that the political history is. You get the picture! There is so much more, but it wears me out .
I’ve gone back to a favorite past time, reading. I used to chain read and I am finding a lot of joy reading new books and re-reading the classics. It keeps the mind open and ready. Though I shall not lie, the occasional binge watch is still in order. I’ve read a few good bios/memoirs this year. Join me at GoodReads if you want.
The adventures of this past week have been run over by something that is looming overhead. Something that may or may not happen, that I have no control over and yet it affects me. It is bringing up certain things from the past and has had me frozen for the past couple of weeks. All I can do is what I can do and try not to let this overwhelm me or dictate my actions. We all have things that come our way that we work through, so that is what I am now doing. I feel as though I am just getting up after having the wind knocked out of me.
Normally this will be a weekly catch up, this post was longer and less fun than those to come, ha. I guess it’s harder than I thought to just jump in and start blogging.
(This mornings soundtrack started off with Frank Zappa and The Yardbirds, but quickly morphed into the first 4 Blondie albums)
Frank Zappa – Suzy Creamcheese
Yardbirds – For your love
Plastic Letters (1978)
Parallel Lines (1978)
Eat to the Beat (1979)
All around me this morning you can see the spring peeking through as the last hues of winter leave. Continue reading